My PSDit Joey

Friday, November 24, 2017

Guest Blogger- Jennifer Scott of Spirit Finder: Surviving the holidays despite anxiety

Surviving The Holidays Despite Anxiety
Jennifer Scott 

Now that winter is here, so are the traditional holidays. Even if you don’t follow any particular tradition, it’s common to gather together with family, have some big meals, and exchange gifts.

For some people, the holidays also mean fights with family, feeling lonely, and being anxious about it all. If you’re hosting, the anxiety can increase as you worry about cooking, cleaning, and finding room for everybody. Thankfully, there are some steps you can take to control your anxiety and enjoy the holidays this year. Just know it’s not you — there are legitimate reasons why people feel more anxious around the holiday season.

Image Source: Pixabay

Why Anxiety Gets Worse

Is there something about family gatherings and the winter holidays that makes anxiety worse? Popular Science says yes, and that’s because you often have expectations. Holiday movies and looking at the past with rose-colored glasses can give you an unrealistic expectation of how things should go: Everyone gets along, food and gifts are plentiful, and people travel all kinds of distances to be together.

But in reality, those rarely happen. People can argue, money can be tight, and many cannot travel for several reasons. When your expectations are not met, it makes you feel sad and anxious. You start to wonder what’s wrong with you and your family even though some problems are to be expected.

For some, the problem is less the family and more the traveling. From a fear of flying to worrying about directions, it makes sense to be anxious at this time of year because travel is stressful.

Focus On Holiday Fun

Even if the holiday anxiety is normal, it’s still not fun. That’s why you should take some steps this holiday season to focus on having fun. The Bustle has several great recommendations for enjoying the holidays. Make sure you take care of your physical needs (sleep, diet, etc.), especially if you get a cold. Understand that you cannot do everything and that it’s perfectly fine to say no, even at this time of year.

And if you find yourself sitting around and getting anxious, go and do something fun. Shopping, games, or just catching a movie can give you something positive to focus on. They also help give your mind and body a break from stress.

Remember that holidays should be a group effort. If you’re hosting, don’t try to make the big holiday meal all by yourself. Get some help from your family, even if that means they bring a cold dish you can heat up in the microwave. If you’re feeling blue, talk to people about your feelings so they know there’s a problem. Your support network cannot help if they don’t know they’re needed.

If Addiction Is A Problem

The holidays can be a stressful time, but for those in addiction recovery, it gets harder. That’s because many people serve a lot of alcohol at these gatherings and parties. If you have worked hard to become sober, don’t let holiday anxiety get to you. Instead, recommends you plan on how to say no.

Literally practicing how to decline a drink can make it much easier to do so. (Some people will offer you a drink without realizing you’re sober these days.) You should also be prepared to explain why you’re not drinking in a way that’s comfortable for you.

Beat Those Holiday Blues

This time of year should be fun and relaxing. However, it’s normal to face stress, sadness, and anxiety around the holidays. Protect your physical health, say no when you have to, and get help from friends and family when you need to. And if you’re in addiction recovery, practice how to decline a drink. These tips can help you create great memories this holiday season.

Links to sources used:

Thursday, September 28, 2017

Using political views to stigmatize others

Driving home today, I saw a large sticker plastered on the back of a truck that read: LIBERALISM IS A MENTAL DISORDER.
To be fair, I'm not sure if the driver was referring to a mental illness or a developmental disability, so I'll address both... since, of course, I want to be politically correct. Both mental illness and developmental disabilities or delays transcend one's political ideology.
When being treated for mental illness, if you can afford it, you meet people of all walks of life. Every socioeconomic status, ethnicity, religion, gender, sexual orientation, and political party is impacted by mental illness. 20% of American adults have a psychiatric disorder, so if you can't think of someone close to you who battles mental illness, then they just aren't telling you. Would you park this truck in a neighborhood that just lost a community member to suicide, or outside a house where a person with anxiety is learning to cope with his mental illness so he can attend college?
As for developmental disabilities, I wonder if the driver would feel proud parking his truck at a treatment center for children and adults with developmental disabilities or in a neighborhood where the community loves and respects their neighbors who have developmental disabilities. For people with a developmental disability or families who are fighting for the rights of their loved ones, seeing a sticker like that is a reminder that people with disabilities should not have a voice or an opinion.
As a woman coping with a mental illness, the daughter of a special education teacher, a family member of people battling mental illness, the friend of a family touched by cerebral palsy, the former babysitter of a child with a disability, and as a future human services worker, I will forever fight for the rights and well-being of the people society says have "A MENTAL DISORDER." Liberal, conservative, in the middle, wherever you stand on the political spectrum: DO NOT LET POLITICS BE YOUR EXCUSE FOR STIGMATIZING PEOPLE UNLIKE YOURSELF.
If you have a "mental disorder" or are the loved one of a person with a "mental disorder," stand up for what's right.

Sunday, September 10, 2017

World Suicide Prevention Day 2017 and Project Semicolon

September 10th is World Suicide Prevention Day, and for so many people around the world, it's a day where they remember a person close to them or their community who lost his or her life to suicide. Some people will reach out with support to someone who has or had suicidal ideation. Some people will reflect back to a time when they were suicidal. All of these scenarios are covered in Project Semicolon: Your Story Isn't Over, described by people who have been touched by suicide. Started by Amy Bleuel, the Semicolon has become a globally recognized symbol for suicide awareness, representing that someone's story could have ended, but he or she decided to keep going.

I was excited for the book to finally be published, as I learned last year that a piece I wrote about my journey with mental illness would be included in the book. I explained how I found hope when I found my psychiatric service dog, Joey. Even though my story wasn't about suicide, I submitted it, hoping that mine and Joey's journey together could inspire people to keep going and show them that things will get better. Maybe people will research how psychiatric service dogs can change their lives too. Joey helped me realize that my hopes and dreams could still come true. He helped me uncover the strength and fight that I still had inside me. I want other people to read this book and understand that their stories or a loved one's story isn't over, and they are not alone ❤️

Monday, August 7, 2017

My Journey with Joey

Joey has been my faithful companion and loyal friend since February of 2015. He began training to become my psychiatric service dog to help me lead a more independent and fulfilling life by learning tasks to help me manage my severe anxiety disorder. He would accompany me to stores, restaurants, gas stations, or anywhere else in public that my anxiety had prohibited me from going. He was my date to several events and inspired me to speak openly about my mental illness and educate people about stigma and the use of psychiatric service dogs. On our journey together, we met incredible people and found love and support from our community and from all over the country; I'm beyond thankful.

A lot has changed in my life within the past year and a half. After several years of drastic medication changes, my doctors finally found the correct combination. This balance allowed me to develop coping skills and focus on my treatment. I was discharged from the intensive therapy program I had been in for nearly 2 years. I re-enrolled in college where I'm pursuing a degree in Community and Human Services. My mind and body are growing healthier, and I've found confidence in myself again.

As my mental health has improved, I've found that I haven't had to rely so heavily on Joey. He has become more of an emotional support dog over the last several months. I often get asked, “Where's Joey?” when people see me out. When I answer that he is home, some people look disappointed, but really, it is a positive thing for me to be out in public as an independent young woman. Although Joey is not currently acting as my service dog, I know that he could do this for me if I ever need this type of support again.

Even though I'm not using a psychiatric service dog at this time, Joey and I will continue to raise awareness and support for psychiatric service dogs and emotional support dogs. We will forever fight for those with mental illness and work to end stigma. I will continue to use Facebook and Instagram as a way to educate and connect with people. As I write this, Joey sits by my side (hoping I drop some of my dinner). Joey has been by my side every step of the way, and he will always remain by my side. For whatever the future holds, he will always be my rock, my hero, and my best friend.

Wednesday, June 7, 2017

4 years later

Yesterday I drove an hour north to Troy to attend an overnight Governance Retreat for SUNY Empire State College. I represented my region on the Student Affairs Committee, as the primary representative couldn't make it. I had the most amazing time meeting faculty, staff, and students from all around the state. The experience motivated me to keep working hard in my studies and encouraged me to get more involved in student life.

As I drove home today, I reflected on my journey. Last week was the 4 year anniversary of when my family and I realized I had a mental illness. If you’re familiar with my battle with an anxiety disorder, you'd know that going on this trip would've been impossible for me, even just a year ago. I faced serious issues and obstacles during my battle with mental illness, but for me, nothing was as painful as the day I had to withdraw from my senior year of classes at SUNY New Paltz. I was just 30 credits away from my Bachelors degree.  As much as I wanted to explore what was around me and experience adulthood, my priority throughout my recovery was feeling safe. I wasn't going to push myself to the point of jeopardizing the recovery process. I’m glad I took the time to rebuild my strength and discover which coping mechanisms work for me.

I spent the drive today thinking about how far I've come in 4 years and how much I want people with mental illness to have these peaceful and happy reflections. Both those with psychiatric disorders and those without need to understand that a chemical imbalance in the brain or experiencing trauma should not determine one’s future or limit one’s potential. That is why I speak. That is why I write. That is why I will always share my story.

The rest is still unwritten...

Wednesday, March 15, 2017

Reflecting on turning points: TMI Project

In January, I officially became a college student again. For a couple years, I hadn't even considered returning to school to be a realistic goal for myself. By the summer of 2016, I finally felt confident and prepared enough to look into finishing my bachelor's degree. By November, I was accepted to SUNY Empire State College, ready to pursue a degree in Community and Human Services.
Now, in the middle of March, I have just begun my second class in the program. One of these classes is Crisis Intervention. For our "icebreaker" post, we were asked to write about a turning point in our lives, a time that we felt nervous or uncertain but resulted in something fantastic. One of the most incredible turning points in my life was when I decided to sign-up for a TMI Project memoir writing workshop; it truly changed my life and changed the way I thought about my journey with mental illness. I wanted to use my blog to publically share what I wrote for my icebreaker discussion:
Crisis Intervention- Turning points
I believe that the most important and definitive aspects of my life have been the results of turning points. The largest obstacle I have faced in my life has been coping with and healing from a sudden and severe anxiety disorder I developed at 21, right after my Junior year of college ended in 2013. Since then, I have confronted several turning points as I have been getting my life back and learning about who I am as an adult and what I want out of life.

 In 2015, I learned about the TMI Project. This nonprofit comes to the facility where I attend therapy and hosts a 10-week workshop where people meet to write about their personal stories which are then formed by the directors into individual 8-minute monologues. The workshop concludes with a performance of these personal monologues to an audience. The thought of opening-up to a small group of strangers in the workshop was unnerving enough, but imagining sharing my story a room full of people and then having the video on posted to YouTube terrified me. Despite my reservations, I took a chance and signed up for the workshop beginning at the end of September.

Each week I attended, I became increasingly comfortable with the other members of the group and slowly realized that this experience was changing the way I felt about myself and my illness. The monologue made from my pieces was perfect, and when the day of the performance arrived, I felt more at ease and confident than I could have imagined. Sharing my story that day resulted in an incredible chain of events. I started a blog about mental illness, was invited by the TMI Project to read that monologue at many various events, became the recipient of the YWCA of Ulster County’s Next Generation Award, applied to SUNY Empire State College to pursue a degree in Community and Human Services, and was recently elected to the Board of Directors of the YWCA of Ulster County. My life has not taken the path I had originally planned, but I could not be more thankful. It was at that crucial turning point where I discovered my strength and my passion for helping others.

Monday, February 13, 2017

Valentine's Day and mental health

Valentine's Day can bring up many different emotions for people. Some look forward to February 14th and others dread it. Some make romantic plans for the day and others choose not to celebrate it. Throughout the years, I've experienced each of these feelings.

Whether or not someone has a mental illness, this time of year can amplify feelings of loneliness or hopelessness. Through the beginning of February, virtually every store has displays or aisles of red decorations, boxes of chocolates, sentimental cards, teddy bears, and various stuffed animals that dance to old love songs when you press a button. It can be overwhelming. Even if someone doesn't agree with the commercialism of the holiday or even the holiday in general, these things can become a reminder that he or she doesn't have a significant other or romantic partner in his or her life.

In 2015 and 2016, I was single on Valentine's Day. I was also working on my healing and learning how to cope with my severe anxiety disorder. As many jokes as I made about "Singles Awareness Day" or as many times as I told myself that February 14th was just another day, it would still sting to see Valentine's decorations, jewelry commercials, engagement announcements, or Facebook posts about being in love. Although it was difficult to accept, I knew that it was crucial to make my mental health the priority on those Valentine's Days. In 2015 and 2016, I made it through the holiday in 2 different ways.

2015:  This was an extremely difficult time in my life. Not only was it the first Valentine's Day being single in 4 years, but I was also withdrawing from a semester of college that was just too overwhelming for me at the time. The combination of these factors gave me depressed and disappointed feelings. That year, my parents helped me stay strong by giving me a stuffed animal and candy and by sending me quotes about strength throughout the day. They showed me the importance of loving, respecting, and being kind to myself. I decided to treat myself to my favorite lunch, made a batch of brownies to share with my family, and curled up with my kitten to watch a feel-good movie (I believe it was something with Adam Sandler). I took the day to take care of myself and remind myself that I am strong, brave, and deserving of the best kind of love. That year I was my own valentine, and that was the kind of love I needed most.

2016:  By February of 2016, my mental health was in a much better place. I had begun blogging and speaking openly about my mental illness, so I felt more confident and hopeful for the future. Although I was not seeing anyone or in a relationship, I was still surrounded by love that Valentine’s Day. This year, I decided to spend the day making little gifts for my friends and family to show them how much I loved and appreciated them. They had been there for me during my hardest times, and I was so thankful. That night, my family gave each other the little valentines we had made over Chinese takeout then had Valentine’s Day cupcakes and watched Food Network. Being with the ones I care about made me remember that my happiness wasn’t defined by my relationship status. I would fall in love again one day, but if I just sat around waiting for that to happen, I would miss out on so many other incredible life experiences. My family and friends were my valentines that year, and I felt extremely loved and cared for.

This Valentine’s Day, I am thankful that I was patient and waited for the right one. In September, I wrote an article about dating with a mental illness. I mentioned that online dating wasn’t for me because of my anxiety. Just over a month later, my mom finally convinced me to join That same night, I came across the profile of the most amazing man. Ethan is the person I hoped I would eventually find: kind, loving, and supportive and understanding of my battle with mental illness. I don’t feel as if I need to hide my struggles from him, and I feel comfortable just being myself.  Meeting him was worth the wait.

To everyone who is single on Valentine’s Day: Be kind to yourself. Tell the ones you love that you care about and appreciate them. Give a valentine to someone who might otherwise not receive one or to someone who is working instead of spending time with family. Celebrate friendship. Treat yourself to a favorite meal. Eat that drug store chocolate that comes in a heart-shaped box. Remember that you are amazing just as you are. Remember that your worth is not determined by your relationship status. Remember that you are deserving of the best love and don’t need to settle or change for anyone. And if you believe that you are ready to find the perfect person, take the chance and try online dating (I recommend!

Happy Valentine’s Day everyone!